Insanity
by Talimanie
Summary: Julie Carter lives with her adoptive parents, sister and brother in Ohio. At her first day at the McKinley she met someone, who will change her life forever. But he doesn't know that she is insane like she calls herself. [Ryder/OC]
1. Beginning of Insanity

_Hello everybody! First up, I like to introduce myself._

_My name is Katie (aka Catfish ... no, I'm just joking :D), I am 15 years old and I'm from Germany. I posted this Fanfiction of a german website befor, but season four has not started in Germany yet. Of course I watched the season in the origanal, because I coulnd't wait until July, when it will be in the german TV. From episode three on I totally start loving Ryder Lynn/Blake Jenner. He is so cute and handsome and I reeeally like his eyes :D. So I started a Fanfiction (in german). But because not many people know him yet in my country, I decided to translate my story in english and post it on this website. Please don't hate me, when there are spelling - or grammatic errors. I am still studying and I'm doing my best. _

_I hope you like my story and I'm looking forward to your reviews (If there will be any reviews. :D). _

_~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~_

_Insanity_

My life always was quiet bad. Maybe that was the reason for hiding myself and talking to nobody. And that made me some problemes. At my old School in Calirfornia I was bullied. Not only at School, on the Internet too. That's why I deleted my facebook account many months ago.

I don't have to talk about my parents. They are awful people. Earlier it was nothing special when they send my into my room, locked the doors and made party in our house. Well, they were young. My mum got me when she was 16 years old. Maybe they wanted to feel like teenagers again. But they aren't teenagers anymore, they are parents.

So I sit in my room for three days. Nothing to eat, nothing to drink. I had luck that I got my own bathroom right behind my room, so I got something to drink, but still nothing to eat.

I started cutting myself. First only my legs, so nobody could see it but later I started cutting my arms. One day, my father saw the sarcs on my arm and totally freaked out. He punshed me into the face, send me into my room and locked the door again. And that was the time when I was at the end. Everything became too much for me.

Two months ago I went to one of those youth welfare departments. They believed me and came over to my house. And of course, my parents didn't clean up after their last party.

Those guys from the youth walfare department put me into a hostel for teenagers where I lived one month. They found a new family for me where I could live until I'm 21.

My 'adoptive parents' Lauren and Thomas are really nice people and they gave my more love at my first day at their house in Ohio than my real parents ever did. Besides me, they got two other adoptive childs. First: Ethan, a 16 years old boy with dark skin, who is from California too. He told me that his real parents are from Africa but they send him away after his birth. Second: Megan, a cute 11 years old with long blond hair. She is so sweet, I wish she was my real sister. And now, Lauren and Thomas got a second adoptive daughter. My name is Julie Carter and I'm 15 years old.

Tomorrow is my first day at the now school, the McKinley High. Ethan promised to pay Attention to me. But I know that it wouldn't be this easy. He is a junior, I'm a sophomore.

But I promised myself, that I am not going to be a wallflower again.


	2. The stranger

Together with Ethan I walked in my new school for the first time the next day. Ethan told me a lot of the McKinley but not only good things. He told me about the footballers which love to throw shlushies into other peoples faces. The sad thing about this is, is that Ethan is one of those footballers. He promised me that he never throw a shlushie into someones face but I'm not sure about that.

We walked down the hallway and looked out for my locker. Suddenly a blonde girl stepped in our way and smiled. But it wasn't a friendly smile. More like a devil smile.

"Hey, chocolate marshmallow, is this you new girlfriend?", the girl asked.

"She's not my girlfriend. This is Julie, my sister." Ethan grabbed my shoulders and pushed me softly forward but the girl was following us.

"Your parents adopted one more child? Isn't your house to small for one more adoptive daughter?"

"No, it's not. And now leave us alone, Kitty. We have to find her locker."

"So, your name is Julie?" This Kitty girl touched me on the shoulder and I turned around.

"Uhmm … yes. Why?"

"Do you only like Zombies too or do you have a thing for human boys?" She giggled like this was a funny joke.

"Today you're really funny again. Don't you have to be at Coach Sylvesters office?", asked Ethan her.

"You are totally right, chocolate marshmallow. See you at the training. By the way, welcome to McKinley High, Zombie Girl." Then she walked away and finally leaved us alone. Ethan shaked his head and pointed at one locker.

"This is yours. You better notice where it is or it would be hard to find it." I nodded and opened the locker.

"This Kitty girl ... doesn't she known your name or does she just like dumb nicknames?", I aks after I put some books in the locker.

"Oh no, she knows my name. She really just like those nicknames. She'll call you 'Zombie Girl' for a long time now, trust me."

"Amazing!", I sighed. Then I grabbed my timetable out of my bagpack and surveyed my lessons for this morning. "I've got spanish now with a Mr. Schuester. Gosh, I hate spanish."

"Mr. Schuester is cool, you will like him. And spanish is quiet interesting with him as teacher." I nodded again. Then Ethan left and I tried to find the classroom of the spanish lesson.

Ethan was right. Mr. Schuester was really nice and totally cool. His lesson was fun so it was over quick. The bell rung but our teacher suspended us.

"Today is the last day of casting for our musical. This is your last chance!", he said but no one really listened to him.

On my way to the next lesson I saw the bill-board. _Maybe it would be a good idea to join a club. _I thought. Suddenly I saw the note from Mr. Schuester. I don't really like musicals. Well, I don't hate them but they're not my thing.

"Do you want to be a part of the musical?", suddenly a dark voice said. I turned around and looked in the eyes of a tall boy. He was to old to be a student.

"I don't know...", I meant and turned back to the bill-board.

"Don't you like Grease?" The musical was Grease? I liked this one.

"Of course I like it but ... I don't know. I don't have the voice to be a part of you musical."

"I bet you voice is amazing. Just go to the casting and we will see. We won't be a hard jury."

"You're a part of the jury?"

"Yes. I help Mr. Schue with all the musical stuff. I was in the Glee Club before I graduated last year." _I knew he was to old to be a senior. "_Come on. Try it." I sighed and wrote my name on the list. "Great! See you at the casting! My name is Finn, by the way."

"I'm Julie." Finn shake my hand and walked down the hallway then.

It was 3 pm and my school day was finally over. The casting started at 4 pm so I've got nothing to do. I decieded to wait at the theater before the casting started and learned the lyrics a litte more.

When I stepped into the huge room, I saw to People standing on the stage. One of them was Finn. I didn't saw the other boy before. He was tall but not as tall as Finn. His hair had a light brown colour and his eyes were dark brown. Finn saw me and waved me. I waved back and stepped on the stage.

"Hey, Julie! You're really here. But the casting hasn't started yet."

"I know. I had nothing to do so I decided to wait here until it starts." I looked into the eyes of the stranger. They were beautiful. Really beautiful. I wanted to look into them for a longer time but he would know that I'm insane then. And that's not what I wanted. So I looked to Finn again and smiled.

"Right, this is your first day at the McKinley. So, do you want to audition now? I let Ryder audition now too. It would be just fair." Finn pointed to the stranger.

"Uhmmm ... yeah, of course. It won't be too awkward when I totally fail.", I said and giggled nervously. Finn and that Ryder boy took a step back and the stage was all mine. I took a deep breath and waited for the music to start.

_Once upon time__  
A few mistakes ago  
I was in your sights  
You got me alone  
You found me  
You found me  
You found me_

I guess you didn't care  
And I guess I liked that  
And when I fell hard  
You took a step back  
Without me, without me, without me

And he's long gone  
When he's next to me  
And I realize the blame is on me

Cause I knew you were trouble when you walked in  
So shame on me now  
Flew me to places i'd never been  
Till you put me down oh  
I knew you were trouble when you walked in  
So shame on me now  
Flew me to places i'd never been  
Now i'm lying on the cold hard ground  
Oh, oh, trouble, trouble, trouble  
Oh, oh, trouble, trouble, trouble

I heard Finn and Ryder clapping as I sing the last ton. I turned around and laughed shyly. Finn put his hands on my shoulders.

"I knew it! Your voice is amazing!"

"Thanks."

"Finn's right. Your voice is unique." For the first time I heard Ryders voice. It was soft and I really loved it. I turned away quickly so they couldn't see me blushing.

"You have good chances to get the role of Sandy.", Finn said.

"Really? You think so? But ... I don't want to get the lead character. Maybe I could be Frenchy or Jan. Please Finn. I don't have the voice for Sandy. Take another Girl who has a better voice."

"You have the voice for Sandy, trust me. But if you don't want her role, you don't have to be her. Frenchy will be Sugar. This role is taken. But you can be Jan. Actually Tina should get this character but she is playing Rizzo now." I was really happy with this result. "Okay, guys. I have to go now. Ryder, be prepared for the Call Back tomorrow. See you then." And then Finn left.

"Are you a sophomore?", Ryder asked me as Finn was out of sight.

"Yes. You too?"

"Right. But I think you are 15, because you look a lot like a freshmen." He smiled and surveyed my body. "Ethan told us a lot about you."

"Wait, what? Us? What did he told you?", I said shocked.

"Hey, calm down. He told us about you at football. Just that you are really beautiful and that you are..." _Insane, insane, insane._ "...quiet tall and love basketball." He was right about my height. I was tall but I just could reach Ryders nose.

"Oh, you're one of those Slushie throwers?"

"What? No! I don't throw Slushies!" I raised my eyebrows like I didn't believed him. "I promise!"

"Okay, okay. I believe you.", I said laughing. "But what did you mean with I look like an freshmen?"

"You look really young."

"That's not true!" He was laughing and I punshed his shoulder softly. And just in this moment the sleeve of my vest slided down. Ryder became silent and grabbed my arm. He could see all of my scars.

"What is this?", he asked and stared into my eyes.

"Nothing."

"That's not nothing, Julie." Ryder turned my arm to my face so I could see all my scars. "Tell me what this is. I don't want to be worried about you."

"You don't have to! You don't even know me!", I screamed and he released my arm shocked.

"Aww, did Zombie Girl get a new friend?" Kitty sat in one of the places in front of the stage.

"What do you want, Kitty?", Ryder asked.

"I just wanted to give you a good hint. Be good at the Call Back tomorrow. Puckerman will be your Opponent and he is really amazing. I will be there too and that little wallflower ... I think her name was Marley."

"Thanks for your hin. You can leave now." I heard that Ryder was irritated but I was too.

"Why? I like it in here." Kitty smiled and blinked.

"Well, I have to go home. See you two ... at the rehearse." I grabbed my bag and leaved the theater.


End file.
